One of the worst things I'm watching these days, despite fully knowing better, is the second season of And Just Like That.... The show's existence defies reason; the acting a dull and depressing shade of the cast's former glory. But one minor subplot in the season's fourth episode has managed to stick with me.
The episode begins with Charlotte and her husband, alongside other parents who enroll their children at an elite private school, bidding those kids goodbye as they leave for sleepaway camp. As the bus pulls out, Charlotte and the parents can barely contain their glee. Some go off to boff; others head for a night out at The Mark. But I'm not concerned with these activities, which lay the groundwork for the rest of the episode. Instead, it's the allure of summer camp—and the question of who can afford it—that has provoked some thought in an otherwise thought-sapping television experience.
I've never been to sleepaway camp and therefore have hardly ever thought about it. But as my husband and I struggle with the decision over whether or not to have a second child, the concept of summer camp and how to afford it has obsessed me. The numbers are absolutely astronomical. Sending just one kid to the summer camp my husband went to as a child in Maine would be equivalent to a year in property taxes for most houses around us. Two children would mean sitting at home eating crackers every night until I die, eliminating anything fun in my life, including a generous martini budget.
I'm partially kidding here; to be sure, I'm privileged to even be running the numbers on these scenarios. But I felt a deep pang of envy watching a jubilant Charlotte knowing that as she said goodbye to her kids, she was on the brink of an entire summer without the stresses of caregiving, let alone how to pay for it.
All of this recently led me to "The Families That Can't Afford Summer," an excellent 2016 piece in the New York Times that speaks to many of these issues. It also raises the question of whether summer, a uniquely American invention, should simply be canned. I urge you to read this piece whether you have kids or not. It lays bare so many systemic problems in how this country approaches child care, social mobility, and who gets to enjoy the freedoms that so many, including myself, have long associated with summer.
So tell me, should I have a second kid?
—Inae Oh
